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Happy October, Reader!

I just returned from the PPDA Conference in Boulder, Colorado. PPDA stands for Psychophysiological Disorders Association. It actually doesn’t matter because they are changing their name (because that was a mouthful) to the Association for the Treatment of Neuroplastic Symptoms. (Slightly better, but still kind of a mouthful.)

Anyway, I connected with lots of folks across the country and internationally who are helping people recover from chronic symptoms and feel very energized and part of a larger movement to bring about an important change in healthcare.

Me and mentor, Georgie Oldfield at the PPDA Conference

“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.”

– Albert Einstein

So many of the coping strategies we have adopted to distract from suffering are socially acceptable and even celebrated in our society. These can include the following and more:

• Pushing through
• People pleasing
• Overexercising
• Grit (or stubbornness)
• Planning for any possible scenario
• Busyness
• Hyper-focus on work achievements or overworking
• Perfectionism

These traits are admirable, so it can become hard to recognize there is anything hurtful about them. However, they all have one thing in common. They distract us from being with discomfort, whether that stems from our emotional state or or physical state.

What’s the problem with that?

Perhaps you’ve heard the phrase, “Whatever you resist persists.” By avoiding or distracting from things, sensations, emotions, etc. that make us feel uncomfortable, we are inadvertently teaching our brain that feeling those things is dangerous. The more we distract, the more “danger” goes unheeded and alarm bells begin to go off.

As you know, pain (and symptoms like tinnitus, nausea, fatigue, etc.) is a danger signal that the brain sends when signals from the nerves are interpreted by the brain as dangerous. These interpretations can be incorrect. In the case of chronic pain, the brain is interpreting benign signals as dangerous. So, avoiding discomfort in itself can reinforce this false interpretation.

So what happens?

We feel pain or discomfort? DANGER!

We feel worried about symptoms? DANGER!

We feel stressed? DANGER!

We feel angry or resentful? DANGER!

We feel any shift in bodily sensations? DANGER

Soon everything is setting off the danger alarm and the pain or symptom persists!

In order to stop this vicious cycle we need to do three things.

1. Have awareness that its happening. This is big! Without awareness you unconsciously repeat the same pattern and remain stuck.
2. Be willing to be with discomfort for very brief periods of time without fighting, fearing, white knuckling through. Notice that even in discomfort, in this exact moment you are not under threat. As you observe, support yourself with any soothing messages or actions. It can be helpful to notice the bodily functions that are always working in the background to support you and keep you alive and how great those are working without your having to control any of it.
3. Give yourself praise and reinforcement for doing that unfamiliar action of observing your discomfort (even if it was just for 5 seconds.)

Over time this will help teach your brain that the things you have been distracting from and not allowing yourself to feel are not dangerous after all and the volume on the alarm bell will lower, bit by bit.

It takes time. It takes practice. It takes patience. It takes forgiveness. It takes lightness as well.

You can’t approach it in the same perfectionistic, hard driving, appeasing, distracted, etc. manner that you are used to approaching everything.

You will forget this. You will mess up. You will maybe have to go back to Step 1 of awareness a thousand times. But if you stay the course with kindness and softness you will get there. And if you need support, I’m a reply button away!

With love,

Coach Katie

Get Unstuck and Tap into Hope! 1:1 Coaching Whether you need help with making a decision, creating a plan for healing, or dealing with overwhelm, I’ve got your back! Coaching helps you organize your thoughts, make discoveries about what’s really important to you, and create movement toward overall well being. Coaching helps you dream, plan, and execute to get closer to your optimal self. Benefits of Coaching Increased self trust, confidence, and direction ‘ Fresh perspective on personal challenges Enhanced decision-making skills Greater interpersonal effectiveness Engagement in behavior aligned with core values Greater ease Less overwhelm Increased contentment Improved relationships Stronger boundaries Clearer thinking Better sleep More energy Decreased irritability Personalized, effective tools and strategies to get more of what you want! Sounds pretty dang good, huh? Coaching is individualized. I work with: people in pain to help them implement the tools to settle their nervous systems, people who are looking to make a major life transition, people looking to eat better and exercise more, people wanting better boundaries with others, and more! Coaching is a partnership. You are committed to showing up for yourself and working toward change and I am committed to helping you see your strengths, set your strategies, celebrate your successes, learn from your failures, and grow into the best version of yourself you can be. ​Ready to learn more? I encourage you to schedule a no-commitment, free initial session with me to understand more about how this approach can help you, see if we’re a good fit, and walk away with a tangible next step toward something you’re currently working on. ​ Schedule a Free Intro Session

Flare Care Cards Still Available

Flare Care Cards

If you are need of tools to help you calm your nervous system and phrases to keep in mind when the going gets tough, look no further. I developed these cards as a way to help me remember my tools when I needed them most. Now they are available to share with you. Each deck includes 32 cards with mindfulness, breathing, and body awareness exercises, as well as “Don’t Panic” phrases to calm the fearful mind.

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